I'm JOY, 18, F, Philippines. This is my online diary. I post whatever I want. I'm single, I'm just waiting for my Prince Charming to come. I write story on wattpad, that's my Hobby. I'm a computer Geek. Deal with it :)
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Hey! I’m back, been busy this past few months, when I said I’m busy, I mean it, like it was busy as hell. Okay, so much for that. I am here, typing because of some thoughts that bugging me.
I am always saying to my friends that I already move on from my past relationship, and believe it. My friends are always believing me, even myself believe that I already move on. I experienced all the things that says that I already move. I am happy flirting, going out on a date but opening a relationship for me is so hard. Its so damn hard. I had many love declarations coming from different boys but I turn it down. I don’t know the reason why I cant force myself to try being in a relationship again.
As the days passes by, my life is been complete, without the hassle of being in a relationship. But there’s this time comes that my past is bugging me. I saw my great ex boyfriend who had suppose to have amnesia to forget me that easy. I mean, he forget me that fast, although he don’t suffer from anything, its he’s choice to forget me. I used to say that he had an amnesia o that it would lessen the pain I am suffering before.
As I as him, there is this familiar feeling that I experienced before. And the fact that he’s around makes me feel nervous, and it scares me to death. My best friend, which is suppose to be his best friend to told me the reason why he leave me. He said that my Ex is just worried about me, when he go to the ocean and sail. He’s studying marine transportation anyway. That I will be lonely when he will go on his training. Know what makes me angry? Its just that he didn’t bother to tell me. I’m sure I’ll understand me. But he didn’t tell it.
I am now confusing on what will happened. My emotion are now in mixed. I want to slap his face, slap him that hard so that he would feel the pain that he cause me, so that he would feel the deep scars he leave me. I want to scold him. But I can’t make it, it wouldn’t change the fact that he hurts and leave me.
He wants me to be his friend, and I agreed. We are friends before so I accept it. Not because I love him. I loved him. I want to be his friend since he wants me to be his friends too. We don’t end up being together but at least we remain friends after what happened.
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